Alright, alright, I’ve calmed down. The marbles have been found, the nuts are out of the fruit loaf, the bats have flown the belfry. Or something. Actually, reading that back maybe the bats are still in the belfry. Whatever.
I’ve noticed a strange phenomena with the hot flushes that come with Suprecur injections. I had the same feeling when I had Zoladex, just then it was much more intense than this. I feel vaguely anxious all of the time, then just before a hot flush I get a feeling of extreme anxiety and the same feeling in my stomach that comes if you go down a rollercoaster. You know, the weeeeee feeling. It’s very strange when it’s so physical and disconnected from what I’m thinking about at the time. It just sneaks up on me, then weeeeeee! (sweat). One minute I’m sat around wondering if I should eat a digestive or a custard cream, whether I fancy Henry Cavill or Samuel T Anders more, then BAM, weeeee! (sweat). The feeling isn’t easily distinguishable from excitement, so in a way since these side effects started a couple of days ago, I feel vaguely excited all the time. Or anxious. Depends.
Well, that was a long way round to say nothing. I can’t remember where I’m going with this. Oh yeah, my body is excited. Hang on, that sounds very wrong. I’ll move on. I’m bruising terribly with these injections, so I’ve decided to inject myself in the pattern of star constellations. So far I’m going for The Plough on my left leg and it’s looking pretty sweet. I bet you like pictures of bruised, fat, white legs so I’ll post a picture ASAP once I’m done.
Some infertility related things and non-related things from this week so far:
1. I found a notebook from about 3 years ago (yawn, there is a point to this, I’m not just going to tell you what boring stuff I’ve done this week. If I was going to tell you that, I’d tell you that I cleaned out my kitchen cupboard and found 5 jars of marmite all in different states of consumption/decay. I don’t even like marmite? What does this mean?) Anyway, in an attempt to cheer myself up and be optimistic the Barren Betty of before-she-knew-just-how-barren-she-was wrote a really long list of baby names she liked. She’d forgotten doing that until she found the bloody notepad yesterday, but now she remembers going back and looking at it quite a bit over the first year of “trying” (puke). Hang on, slipped into the third person there. Crazy or lazy? I hope the grammar police aren’t reading this.
2. I also found a baby blanket I started knitting for myself about 2.5 years ago. How much of an idiot was I? Wait, sorry, I’m not starting that again. Suffice to say, it is only half finished. I can’t bring myself to finish it, or throw it away so it will probably remain that way forever.
3. Snails kept eating the vegetables I planted in my garden, so I put some snail killer down. I have killed 70 snails. Not sure that was worth a few lettuces.
4. I made some homemade pizzas at the weekend, and they weren’t as crispy on the bottom as usual. I threw such a major tantrum about this, I think my husband had to go and hide under a table for about 3 hours. In retrospect I’m wondering if I might have been upset about something else really and not the pizzas, although we all know nobody likes a soggy bottom.
I have literally just learnt that The Plough constellation is called The Big Dipper in the US. I literally feel like I am on a rollercoaster, and I am stabbing myself with a bruise tattoo of The Big Dipper. Coincidence? I don’t think so.
What star constellation shall I go for on my right leg? I quite fancy Orion, but it looks pretty big and I’m not sure that I am actually fat enough to pull it off.
P.s. WordPress recommended I tag this with Breaking Bad. Eh?