Symptom Watch

People keep telling me not to symptom watch. I’m not a very good listener at the best of times (and this certainly isn’t the best of times), so I’m doing it anyway. Maybe I’ll live to regret that next week, maybe not. Who cares?

My 2 day transfer was 5 days ago. In theory if my little average embryos are still alive they should be implanting now. I consulted Dr Google about implantation bleeding because I was very skeptical it was a real thing. These embryos are microscopic. That means very, very, very small. One or two microscopic dots burrowing into my lining will cause bleeding? Bleeding? Really? A needle hardly causes bleeding and that is not invisible to my naked eye. Anyway, I was wrong. It is a real thing, but apparently only happens about a third of the time. If you are about to Google it too, I urge you not to. The first thing that comes up is a picture on Google images of someone holding their sanitary pad up to the camera with implantation bleeding on it. I worry about humankind sometimes and this kind of thing doesn’t help.

I am also watching out for implantation feelings. I have had some mild, sharp pain the last day or so and today. For this to be implantation I will have to ignore my theory that something microscopic can’t cause pain or bleeding in reality, but only in the minds of loony bins like me. So be it. Implantation feelings, check!

The only symptoms I really have are progesterone-induced sore, giant boobs, cramp from egg collection and a headache. The cramp has been pretty bad. The first couple of days after egg collection were just uncomfortable, then I awoke on Tuesday morning to horrific, sharp, stabbing pain in my abdomen. This was no burrowing embryo. It felt like a smear (or pap. Why do we call it smear? That is such a horrible word) test was being conducted with a sharp knife. Obviously I toughed it out for two hours because I am hard, but I caved eventually and called the clinic, did a pathetic cry down the phone and went in to see the doctor. After a bit of poking, prodding, scanning and blood testing, it was confirmed that I would make it. They think the pain was due to fluid that had collected behind my uterus after egg collection, combined with my endometriosis and basketball sized ovaries. I feel much better now, albeit somewhat crampy.

Also, if being irritated and grumpy is a pregnancy symptom too, then I am 99% positive that I am probably definitely pregnant.

Ok, ok. I basically have no symptoms. Symptom Watch is turning out to be pretty boring.

I’ve told myself I won’t test early. I obviously wasn’t listening very hard (see above) because I bought 4 pregnancy tests in town today. The clinic already gave me one, so that makes 5. Either I am planning on doing 5 tests in a row next Friday (Official Test Day), or I have a covert Test Early And Daily special ops planned. Who knows. I’ve told myself I won’t test early and I’m not (usually much of) a liar.

So we have one more week left of the two week wait. Half of me is wishing the time away and half of me wants to stay forever in the place where I might still be pregnant.

BB xx

P.s. I am computer-less this week and my iPad is (rudely) blocking me from commenting on other people’s blogs. I wrote a few really long, important messages as well that are now lost forever. I’m sorry if you think I’m not rooting for you/excited about your good news/lamenting with you. I totally am! I imagine I will inundate you all with messages next week to make up for it.


22 thoughts on “Symptom Watch

  1. My1111wish

    Most of the women on my boards get implantation bleeding. It’s natures cruel way of messing with you even after all you’ve already been through. Fingers crossed that little bean is burrowing nice and snug!

  2. cindysn

    I was symptom watching and had barely any to speak of. I thought I was 100% out but goes to show you “symptoms” are not always true indicators

    1. barrenbetty Post author

      That’s interesting! I have such bad cramp still from egg collection, I’m not sure I’d really notice any other pain. At least I will find out soon enough! x

  3. Isabelle

    You’re almost there to the finish line! I am so sorry about the pain…. This process is definitely no fun. I am in the not testing camp coz I really hate seeing the stark white on the HPT. I can’t wait for you to pee on your sticks tho! You’re PUPO girl!

    1. barrenbetty Post author

      Whoo hoo, PUPO! I sort of feel like I’ve seen so many negative tests and never a positive, more negatives won’t bum me out that much. I’m probably wrong.

      Your blog was one of the blogs I wrote a long important message on that got erased… The gist was mainly great news about your embryos!! And extra super good luck for your transfer (tomorrow?) xx

      1. Isabelle

        Thanks girl! I am crossing my everything for you that there will be two nice dark lines on your HPT! Thank you for your good wishes! I need all of it. My doc called and said that one of the embryos is splitting well and is grade 1 but the other two aren’t. So… I am trying to chill and not think too much about the other two. AND not to do any google search. This is getting harder….

    1. barrenbetty Post author

      Thank you! I can’t imagine a BFP at the moment. I’ve got lots of books to read and DVDs to watch next week, but I’m not at work so that could backfire on me if I do start to go crazy!

  4. lydiaseeks

    Yes, I am here right now too: “Half of me is wishing the time away and half of me wants to stay forever in the place where I might still be pregnant.”

    I’m testing next Friday as well. Fingers (and toes) crossed up tight!!

    1. barrenbetty Post author

      Eek! Fingers crossed for you too! Are you going to wait until Friday to test? I really am planning on it at the moment, but I know what I’m like. I’d open my Christmas presents in November if anyone would let me.

      1. lydiaseeks

        I’m going to try, but honestly I’ll probably break down on Wednesday or Thursday. I almost always do. It helps prepare me for hearing my very sweet nurse say “I’m so sorry to tell you the test was negative” which I always make her say to my VM so I don’t cry. But I feel like I can make it until then! We’ll see…good luck!!

  5. newtoivf

    I’m hoping so hard for you… I bought 10 tests… and did them all! I think either way you’ll need a load to convince you of the result! 1 week to go, you’re on the home straight now xx

    1. barrenbetty Post author

      Thanks love. I almost bought a digital one today, then decided £20 was too much to waste. Made me realise how pessimistic I’m feeling about the whole thing! I think that’s why I’m not feeling too crazy yet, I just can’t imagine it working. Hope you are doing okay xx

  6. Steph Mignon

    Implantation bleeding is real, I swear! I had a pregnancy in my early twenties that I don’t talk about on the blog much because it was SO long ago and for that one I had implantation spotting for sure. For this second and most recent pregnancy, NOTHING. I also had like NO pregnancy symptoms. With that said, even if you feel nadda you might very well be pregnant! Fingers, toes, eyes, and hair crossed. Hoping, praying, visualizing a positive result for you!

    1. barrenbetty Post author

      I’m getting the impression that you can have symptoms and not be pregnant, not have symptoms and be pregnant, and visa versa. Hmm. Since I’ve never been pregnant I don’t suppose I should waste too much time agonising over it!! Thanks for your good vibes… The eye crossing really made me lolz. I realised I’ve written a few comments on your blog that never published 😦 grr! Much good luck with IUI number one and Happy Anniversary! My follicle count has varied from scan to scan too. Our ovaries are obviously in cahoots playing evil tricks on us.

  7. Pingback: Two Week Wait – Half Way Point | Becoming a Single Mother

  8. InLimbo

    IVF is such a roller coaster, and it sounds like you’ve had such a long, painful, and frustrating journey to your first egg transfer. I feel for you, and I wish you the best of luck! I hope those embies stick!

  9. missymakes

    I had no implantation bleeding and really no symptoms that couldn’t be attributed to progesterone other than some sharp pains just like you’re having. Hoping this is it for you!

  10. Pingback: The PUPO games | barrenbetty

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