I definitely have the plague. It can’t be anything else because I feel too poorly. My fever peaked at an impressive 103.5F today. Isn’t that close to the temperature when you set on fire or melt or something? I’m pretty certain I saw a unicorn last night, or hallucinated one in my feverish delirium. I told Mr Barren off because he really isn’t showing much interest in how poorly I am. This is as good as it got:
ME: I am so poorly. I’m a feverish and shivery and all my joints hurt. I feel like I’ve been trampled.
MR B: oh dear.
ME: you aren’t being nice enough to me. I need looking after.
MR B: I’m not really am I? exaggerated oh dear voice poor widdle Betty.
ME: you are useless.
MR B: shall I go and get you some lemons then or something?
Seriously. I feel SO POORLY. Are you bored of this yet? My chest is tight and wheezy. I feel a serious cough about to erupt, and when I cough it’s not a normal cough, it’s like polar bears fighting. I’m so sure I’m going to cook or cough this embryo out. Can that happen? I can’t believe it. This is the worst I’ve felt since I got a chest infection for 4 weeks in April 2003.
Oh yeah! My NEWS!
Guys, I AM PUPO!!!!!
After the lamest cycle ever and a 3 day wait for a fertilisation report, I finally got word this morning that one of the eggs fertilised normally. This was a very protracted conversation that almost lead me to heart failure, but I won’t bore you with the details. Don’t get me wrong, I totally normally would, but if you remember: I am poorly.
We had one 7-cell, 3 day embryo which by the time we rolled up for the transfer was a compacting 7-cell. I am having a wobble that it is an uneven number and it should be 8 cells, but a chance is a chance. The embryologist assured me compaction was good progress and showed me a picture of the embryo on the TV screen. You guys, it looked goddam perfect. All round and compacting. They grade them on a 1-4 basis on development and quality where 1:1 is the worst and 4:4 is the best. My little unicorn fighter is 3:3. At least that’s what the embryologist said, but it looked like a textbook perfect one to me. Maybe she was just jealous or something?
I think I’d better go back to bed. Lolz, okay I’m already in bed but I’m going to lie back down now. Anyone who wants to reassure me that the plague won’t kill the embryo, I can’t cook it or cough it out or sick it up etc etc is most welcome.
*high fives every single one of you*
P.s. Don’t say The Thing.
P.p.s I am never going to mention The Thing again.