Well that will teach me for being positive. A while ago someone told me that positivity had an impact on eggs, and that I was too negative. Think today has proven that little idea wrong.
I’m saying it’s the same, but in some ways it was worse. High five ovaries, you have out done yourself once again you stupid little shits.
The egg collection should have taken 10 minutes, but in the end it took 1h 15m and according to Hero (who was so lovely to me afterwards he made me cry even more) it was “complicated”, “difficult” and a “real exercise”. Thank you endometriosis, you massive BITCH. Good job for everyone I was under the general I guess. He drained the 14 “follicles”, but said that there was a lot of scar tissue and adhesions so they weren’t really all proper follicles. There was a lot of fluid and blood all taking up precious follicle space instead.
Anyways, 14 follicles; 3 eggs. Shit.
This cycle has propelled us well into the 5 figure sum spent/wasted on IVF so far and that has bought me 6 eggs. Shit. I don’t even know if these three were mature, and I won’t find out until Wednesday.
I don’t know what the point of all this is. Even with the maximum dose and multiple IVF rounds I hardly get any chances. I’m back to wondering if I will even get to have a transfer, never mind have any embryos to actually choose from. That appears to be a luxury I will never have.
Just a final quick note before I go and bury myself under a ton of bricks and shout lots of swear words. If you’ve been reading my blog a while, I think you’ll know what’s coming… but please, please don’t tell me it only takes one. I know it does. The fact is that once again, I hardly have anything and I will need to be very lucky for this to be the one that works. It’s hugely expensive and for my age and test results, I am a consistently and inexplicably, a terrible responder. Given the fact that I had so many more follicles this time I think it’s understandable that I am disappointed and upset. It’s all been rubbish, again. I know it only takes one and I am relieved to have three, but I shouldn’t have to think, “oh phew, at least I got an egg” every time.
Ok, consider yourself told off before you even opened your mouths to encourage me (sorry, just imagine being Dr Hero or Mr B today).