Improvement

Gosh, stims are making me awful tired yo.

I had a sudden panic on Friday (who am I kidding, the entire weekend) that the clinic would a) force me to have an egg collection on Wednesday when I was scared it was too early and b) forget about my general anaesthetic. As a result I made Mr B accompany me to today’s scan. As it happened the poor man just spent 40 minutes trying to find a parking space and waited for me while I sorted it all out myself. Oops.

Anyway, the most important part of the day: the waiting room play list. If you need to refresh your memory on the scoring system, here you go:

10 = Top Notch, e.g. pan pipes – nothing offensive or distressing here. Doesn’t interfere with kindle reading etc, etc.
9 = Inoffensive Drivel, e.g. easy listening
8 = Normal music
7 = Joke Music, e.g. The Lion King
6 = Slightly Irritating Drivel, e.g. Taylor Swift
5 = One Direction
4 = Melancholy, e.g. Skinny Love, Birdy
3 = Tear Jerkers, e.g. All By Myself, Celine Dion
2 = Depressing, e.g. Radiohead
1 = Candle in the Wind

Story of my Life, One Direction
Massive lolz. I KNEW IT! The first song that played as my bum hit the seat. I have to confess, I had no idea it was One Direction until I googled it just now*. Talk about a pile of poo. Scoring is pretty easy though – 5.

Side note, since when was it cool to dress like a grubby pirate? I don’t understand kidz these days.

*Mr B makes a One Direction joke where he calls them Wand Erection instead. Say it out loud (quietly, depending on your location). Funny? That might not work in another accent actually. Sorry in advance.

How Long Will I Love You, Ellie Goulding
Love a bit of Ellie Goulding me, but this song is a tad depressing. If I was about to cry it could definitely tip me over the edge. Sigh – 4.

Side note, I just googled this for verification it was indeed Miss Goulding and watched the video. It has Charlie from Casualty in it.

Written in the Stars, Tinie Tempah, ft. Eric Turner
This song collection is even weirder than a radio station. Let’s mix up all this somber drivel with some rap, yo – 8.

Some kind of unidentifiable crap. Oh, I mean “dance” “music”. Query Kylie Minogue.
Dunno – 8?

Skyscraper, Sam Bailey
Ah, another clinic favourite. I’ve heard this one almost as much as Skinny Love. I even know all the words now. It’s a bit warbly isn’t it? And so awfully, awfully, LOUD. I was just about to stick my fingers in my ears when someone turned it down and I panicked that Reception could read minds, which would be pretty bad for me because I am always either a) bitching the clinic out in my head or b) thinking something I shouldn’t about Henry Cavill.

Oh, a score. 6 I guess. This scoring system is so bad.

An African choir song. No idea.
Sounded like it could have been an outtake from the Lion King soundtrack, so – 7.

Human, Christina Perri
I’d never heard this song before and hopefully I will never hear it again – 2.

Only Love Can Hurt Like This, Paloma Faith
I wouldn’t be so sure Paloma, just wait until you need an endometrial scratch or a HSG with blocked tubes. They hurt pretty bad – 4.

Side note, Mr B started singing along to this by the end (in a lady voice) before announcing to the waiting room, “I’ve never even heard this song but I’m already getting into it!” Yep, we guessed.

I bet you are hoping that they aren’t so late with my next appointments aren’t you? Yeah well, me too. Today’s waiting room play list monitoring score is a whopping 44 with a 5.5 average. Borderline One Direction and Slightly Inoffensive Drivel. An improvement, much like my monitoring scan.

Smooth link Betty.

Follicle scan looked better. If only follicles meant eggs. At least it means a chance of eggs, which looked doubtful on the cycles where I only had 2-3 follicles in total. My ovaries are setting a new record this time around. I hope they aren’t building up to the Worst Egg Collection In History, but I wouldn’t put it past the lazy little turds.

I wasn’t paying much attention (unlike me, dunno why) but I think I have 5 on the left: 12, 12, 14, 16, 20mm and 6 on the right: 11, 11, 12, 14, 15, 17mm. I also have 7 more on the right, all under 10. 11 follicles over 10; 7 under 10. Wow. If I didn’t know better, I’d be excited about those numbers.

Egg collection is likely to be Friday. The worst of all egg collection days because it means no fert report until Monday.

Oh God, please let me some eggs and a fert report to worry about.

Almost there now. IVF4 needs to show me some love.

BB xx

P.s. Hero came in and said a very loud and jolly “good morning” to me in a crowded waiting room and it took me about 15 seconds to notice it was directed at me. It wasn’t until I looked up from my Kindle and saw him and the rest of the waiting room looking at me expectantly that I gave him a, “oh, err morning” back. Cringe.

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27 thoughts on “Improvement

  1. lifeasinfertile

    Ok I have story of my life stuck. Anyways, those are really good numbers. Of course like you’ve said, they have to be real eggs so I pray hard for you! Every dog has it’s day! (Not saying you are a dog per se)

    Reply
    1. barrenbetty Post author

      Lol. You can call me a dog if it means it’s my day and I get more than 1 bloody mature egg. My ovaries owe me big time! The doctor said it won’t happen, but I can’t help but feel a bit hopeful with a decent number of follicles… at least it’s a chance.

      Sorry about the song. It’s a terrible one as well.

      Reply
  2. kiftsgate

    I got the joke too!! Pretty proud of myself given that I’m not a native speaker and last time I had to ask you to explain (something about mascarpone..). I feel pretty ignorant, I hardly know any of these songs..
    Glad that results are improving! Hoping for even better news later this week.
    xx

    Reply
    1. barrenbetty Post author

      I’m sorry, that mascarpone joke is particularly dumb!!

      I am starting to learn all these crap songs off by heart… oh dear. I’m glad there are follicles in there that are growing. I’m getting quite uncomfortable now so I really hope it is all actually worth it this time!! xx

      Reply
    1. barrenbetty Post author

      Me too. Actually, I’d give anything for just a poor-average conversion rate now! I’m reading Restless by William Boyd. Tis good so far. I saw the senior nurse today and she just talked like egg collection in theatre was a given and said they’d sort out my bloods etc for admitting me on Wednesday so *hopefully* there will be no last minute dramas. Much harder for them to sort it out on a Friday so I’m still a bit nervous… I really don’t trust some of the nurses!!!

      Reply
  3. Smile

    Haaa, I love your waiting room music scoring system, it kills me. I demand that IVF4 show you some love and that all of those follicles have fabulous eggs, instead of being little teasy assholes (that’s a phrase, right?). Sucks that they make you wait for the fert report until Monday, that seems like additional cruel and unusual torture.

    Reply
    1. barrenbetty Post author

      Totally is a phrase, and I like it! I feel weird now, I can’t help but get my hopes up a bit but at the same time I’ve been here before and the outcome was terrible. I just wish I knew already!!

      I know, it’s mean huh :/ it will be a looooong weekend that’s for sure.

      Reply
  4. julieann081

    This is hilarious. πŸ™‚ Good luck with your egg retrieval! ❀

    Side Note: They don't play music where we go. They have the t.v. on. Generally, around the times we go, there is either news, The Price is Right, or Rachel Ray on. One time, the news show was covering infertility stories and I had to leave and go into another area while my husband was giving a sample. The front desk people were very interested in the story, but I couldn't handle it. I prefer the Price is Right. πŸ™‚

    Reply
  5. Mama, Interrupted

    My clinic has Radio 2 on in the waiting room and on the morning of my egg collection they were quite seriously playing “How do you like your eggs in the morning?” That was brilliant. It was less good when there was a phone-in about teenage pregnancies.

    Really hoping there are some eggs in those follicles. x

    Reply
    1. barrenbetty Post author

      Ahahaha, I love that!!! My husband sings that a lot during IVF cycles too, prankster that he is. Oh I’d quite like a bit of Radio 2 or Radio 4 instead of the shit music playlist, but I didn’t think about phone ins. Could definitely be dangerous.

      And thanks, me too. Even though it’s always been crap in the past I can’t help but hope for a few eggs… I hope I don’t end up too disappointed! xxx

      Reply
  6. eli

    My best fertility waiting room song experience so far has been “Brick” by Ben Folds. It’s a a song about a teenage guy taking his girlfriend to get an abortion and the breakdowns they both have afterwards. The chorus is super cheery: “She’s a brick, and I’m drowning slowly off the coast and I’m headed nowhere.” Great choice, clinic staff. Great choice. I just kind of chuckled in disbelief through the whole thing – kept elbowing B and saying, “Are you hearing this??” Amazing.

    Reply

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